When you do, is he more likely to listen or dismiss you? When someone tells you who they are, believe them. Men will not find power in shaming and silencing male survivors of sexual assault, treating them as effeminate, but instead will heal and empower them, affirming their masculinity. One website my dad frequents warns men not to date single mothers because their children might accuse the boyfriend of molesting them to reap the benefits of victimhood. Well, ideally, Feminism addresses those issues too. But he told me, on our third date, that he thought women should have to get approval from a board before being able to have an abortion. If he thinks that his attitudes are the result of a past bad relationship, is he working on trying to overcome that?
Does he let you speak your mind? Some things to consider: It took years, but he finally started to get it. And every time one of our female friends would mention in passing that her inbox was full of rape threats, he got it a little more and a little more and eventually I married him. Get our newsletter every Friday!